trie: cache collapsed tries node, not rlp blobs (#16876)

The current trie memory database/cache that we do pruning on stores
trie nodes as binary rlp encoded blobs, and also stores the node
relationships/references for GC purposes. However, most of the trie
nodes (everything apart from a value node) is in essence just a
collection of references.

This PR switches out the RLP encoded trie blobs with the
collapsed-but-not-serialized trie nodes. This permits most of the
references to be recovered from within the node data structure,
avoiding the need to track them a second time (expensive memory wise).